I have a plan (no, not a dream).
Not only do I have a plan, I’ve always had a plan.
Two years ago when I graduated high school I would’ve told you my exact life plan with confidence that those things would all come to pass according to my logical timeline.
Shortly after I graduated high school I met someone who changed my life as I knew it. It was only weeks before I would be going away to college, I had no intentions of putting a commitment where it didn’t logically make sense. Even the thought of this relationship went completely against my plan, which is why I vowed to not involve myself in it.
After my vow I had a conversation with someone I greatly admire. She asked me if I didn’t take a chance on this, would I look back and regret not taking it? She acknowledged that I was only 17, but she said if I didn’t learn how to take risks now I would continue to shut out the possibilities of great things for the rest of my life.
Long story short, I took the chance… it didn’t end well. That same woman I have much admiration for asked me after the relationship ended if I regretted taking the risk; the only answer I had was no. I couldn’t see exactly why I didn’t regret it at the time. Here I sit now, far removed from the situation, and I see the stronger, better person I became because of it. Because this situation changed me, it also changed my plan. While I still have a plan, I now see a better, more modified plan for my life that I wouldn’t have seen without this curve in my perfect timeline.
I can only thank God for forcing me to take that risk. While there is a certain level of logicality that I tend to cling to, I am now more willing to put myself on the line. Not just in terms of relationships, but in terms of every opportunity that is presented to me. Why turn away something good, even if it doesn’t specifically align with my plan? Who says this version of my plan is the best? God has improved it before and I don’t want to be the one to get in the way of His much better plan.
I still have a plan.
But I’m ready for God to change it.